Surprisingly, A Monday In The Life Of Ryan Gosling Is Also Pretty Awful
by N/A, 9 years ago |
4 min read
He hates them just as passionately as you.
On Mondays, Ryan wakes up hating life and contemplating the repercussions of playing hooky, just like you.
And when he gets to work, all he wants is for no one to talk to him until he's had his third cup of coffee, just like you.
Two hours in, and he too feels like he's already depleted his work ethic tank.
And his breaks...well, they're the only goddamn saving grace of his Mondays.
When someone tells him they need his help, only for him to find out it's something stupidly simple that no one should ever need help with, he just about loses his shit.
Then someone else asks him to do something stupid easy and he actually does.
Fortunately, his lunch break keeps him from publicly assaulting them and all is right with the world for 30 minutes...
Until it's over and he has to summon the divine powers of the celestial gods just to psych himself up enough to be moderately okay with going back to work.
And he's doing everything he can to fight through his food hangover.
Then, his boss swoops in like an omen of death to remind him of the project due at the end of the day that he forgot about.
And he screams inside, just like you.
So he gets to work. But first, another quick break.
Then, for the next 4 hours, Ryan goes back and forth between toiling away vigorously, and daydreaming of the many glorious things Friday will surely hold in store...
Of course, productivity doesn't come without its interruptions. Ryan's coworkers continue asking him questions the rest of the damn afternoon.
And for a brief moment, his anger starts to get a little dark...okay really dark. Like "Drive" dark.
You...don't you deny it. You've been there too. Every week. EVERY MONDAY.
Then, in some miraculous alignment of stars, it's five o' clock and Ryan peels out of the parking lot to Rage Against The Machine's "Sleep Now In The Fire."
He may not be your average Joe Shmoe, but when it comes to Mondays, Ryan Gosling is just like you.
Stay up, girl. You got this.
